for once, my heart is in it

I know this post counts as double-dipping but I had an idea and I executed it. And now I am tired. This week's theme over at is red, in support of Go Red For Women (women's heart health). It's also "open your heart" week for Project 52.


My immediate thought, based on both themes, was a (broken) heart. After all, my actual heart is broken/in need of repair. I didn't really want to go into it on the blog but the only way this photo makes sense is with some disclosure. My heart has an electrical issue which will be 'corrected' over spring break. I actually knit the heart I am clutching for my 'heart electrician' as a thank you for finally diagnosing me. I am nervous over the idea of having to be hospitalized, which is breaking my heart further.
I feel like I spent the past few months standing alone in a cold, sterile atmosphere, waiting for an answer and trying to hold my heart together. I feel like a shadow of who I usually am, especially when I want so desperately to be shooting nonstop. This is me opening my heart and being honest about why I haven't been posting much as of late.
[For the record, this isn't heart disease and being more "heart healthy" would not have prevented it. But I still encourage everyone, regardless of gender, to look into the tips on Go Red For Women's site.]