one thousand words home

go-karting

2012-02-05T23:24:00.004-05:00

I'm feeling slightly uncreative with my title. I think that's to be expected after going through over 1000 photos in a little over 48 hours.
Friday was team building at work and we went to an indoor go-kart track. I was hoping my heart would cooperate itself so I could drive but that just wasn't the case. Instead, I busted out my telephoto (with the wonky autofocus) and took over 1000 photos of my coworkers driving like crazy people. They're pretty competitive sometimes. That just made it that much harder to get good pictures.

For those of you interested in my specs, I shot these all hand-held with no flash. Program mode, autofocus for most of the shots (but manual for the diptychs where they're coming around the curve and there's blue in the foreground and they're really sharp/in-focus), ISO 1600 for the first few and ISO 2000 for the rest.

this is why I do what I do

2012-02-04T13:31:00.002-05:00

I got a letter in the mail today from Doug's great-grandfather, Ralph. GGR, as I affectionately call him, is my penpal and we write back and forth from Ohio to Florida. Today's letter was a simple request: he saw a photo of mine on Facebook from my visit and he wanted a copy. It's a photo of the driveway of his son's house and in the background, you can see the family homestead.

Grandma Linda and Grandpa Butch have since moved to Colorado so this photo is worth even more to Great-Grandpa Ralph now. I'm mailing it out to him today, along with a few other photos from that trip that should mean something to him.
This is why I live my life through my camera: to document the moments and the places and the people that I don't even want to forget.

my idea of paradise

2012-01-28T21:02:00.000-05:00

I never did blog the photos from last Sunday's trip to the nature preserve. I got a little distracted by the giant print and completely overlooked my "to post" queue. Since I went back today to see how the preserve looks at high noon, I might as well make this post a two-for-one. Consider it my apology.

Last week

I was meeting the twins after their scout meeting got out. When I pulled in to the parking lot, the sandhill crane was standing on the parking stone of the spot I wanted. If I could have safely taken its picture and parked, I would have. Since it seems interested in my camera and my car, I got some amazing pictures that I don't think I should have been able to get safely. (Previous experience suggests that sandhill cranes do not like the sound of the camera shutter.)

After the meeting, we started exploring the boardwalk as a family but were quickly joined by a bunch of other scouts. There wasn't much wildlife to see but the kids were so much fun that I didn't notice. Although that might have something to do with them rocking the floating dock and/or climbing into my lap while I was trying to shoot.

This week

I ventured out during high noon and didn't know what to expect as far as wildlife goes. I did know that midday sun means high contrast and tried to use that to my advantage.

I did some experimentation with HDR techniques to see if I could replicate the tonal range I saw in real life. Nope. Not even close. But I did make some interest composites in Photomatix and Photoshop.

I also had an awesome experience with a wood stork. I could see him from the other end of the boardwalk and I just kept getting closer and closer until some birdwatchers scared him off.

On today's adventure, I took my 10,000th picture on this camera and reset the internal counter.

Happiness is a 2' by 3' print

2012-01-24T21:08:00.003-05:00

I was sitting at work today when brotherface texted me this photo.

In case you never heard this story, let me start at the beginning. This past winter concert was the first time that the band, orchestra, and chorus all performed together. The head of the music department wanted to capture this momentous occasion and asked if anyone knew someone with a decent camera. Since he knew I was bringing my camera anyway, my brother volunteered me to take the picture.
While they were rearranging the stage to fit everyone on, I dashed to the back of the auditorium to stake out my place. I took a few test shots before they started to get the exposure right, make sure I could fit everyone into the frame, and get a decent amount of sharpness. But once the "Hallelujah Chorus" began, I was ready. I took a few different shots as the lighting changed and the musicians moved so I could capture what it was like to be there and hear them play.

Later, brotherface told me that they wanted a large print to hang on the wall. Jokingly, I told him that the largest print Mpix could make is 2' by 3' (yes, that's three feet across) and asked if that was big enough. I priced it and sent the information to the band director, who immediately asked me to order it.

Not only does it have a Brendazzle Photography imprint on the back, he let me sign the front in silver Sharpie. (Ok, silver paint pen. We couldn't find a silver Sharpie in any of the stores we went to.) He also added his own caption on the front and then he hung it up in the band room.
Sorry. I can't contain my excitement. I have this love affair with large prints. I think a lot of photographers do. This is the first large print I ever had made and it's HUGE. I'm not sure how I'm going to top this; luckily, I'm currently redecorating my room.

babies love books [I heart faces]

2012-01-23T07:00:00.001-05:00

It's been a while since I've had an entry for . This week's theme is books and I knew right away I had to submit a photo of Liam. I posted this photo months ago when I went to visit him but it's too cute to only feature once (and I totally miss seeing it in my slideshow).

Chapel Trail nature preserve

2012-01-22T11:53:00.004-05:00

It's always an exciting day when I can announce that I found a new wetlands boardwalk near my house to explore. I don't know how I managed to live here so long without knowing it existed but it makes for a great discovery.
Mom and I ventured out during golden hour for a great adventure. I'm glad we didn't leave our house any later because we would have run out of light. And oh, how gorgeous the light was. I may end up going back again today because it was just so lovely.

The flare on this one is totally natural. The light was so warm and lovely.

This photo is actually two exposures (one for the sky and one for the grass) masked together in Photoshop.

following the light

2012-01-08T12:03:00.004-05:00

As part of my work for my photo resolution(s),I spent about an hour yesterday in my front yarn with my camera.

left: 55 mm, f/5.6, 1/320, ISO 200
right: 55 mm, f/5.6, 1/250, ISO 200

55mm, f/5.6, 1/250, ISO 200

55mm, f/5.6, 1/400, ISO 200

Then, on our way home from dinner last night, we saw a carnival and decided that I needed to take my camera.

At one point, I decided to bust out my fisheye for a few shots. It sort of fell down and has a tiny crack now. But I did eventually get my shot.

Resolution [1:12]

2012-01-08T11:47:00.003-05:00

Remember when I said I was looking for a less demanding photo project for 2012? I found one. Instead of doing a Project 52, I am doing a Project 12. One theme each month, open to my interpretation. With less of a time constraint, hopefully I can get a little more creative.

This month's theme is resolution. My mind immediately spun in multiple directions. First and foremost, my resolution is to keep up with this photo project throughout the entire year. I wish I had been able to keep up with last year's project a little better towards the end and would like to be more successful this time around.

Then I went to an actual photography resolution. I want to become better at shooting in manual mode in difficult moments. I much prefer to work in aperture priority or shutter priority when I'm in a difficult situation because then my camera kind of 'helps' me along. Except I frequently find myself adjusting my settings via exposure compensation anyway. The issue isn't so much what I know as whether I am confident enough to trust my own judgment. So that's my resolution for this year: to become more comfortable shooting manual in tricky situations.

55mm, f/5.6, 1/100, ISO 400

Finally, my mind went to a Jack's Mannequin song. I doubt anyone is surprised about that. "I'm alive but I don't need a witness to know that I've survived. I'm not looking for forgiveness. I just need light. I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution."

Looking Backward, Looking Forward

2011-12-31T10:17:00.004-05:00

2011 has been an interesting year, to say the least.

Since a lot of blogs I read have been doing retrospectives, I thought maybe I would do mine too.

First and foremost, I have to admit that I lost the ability to keep up with project 52 towards the end of the year. With everything else I had to do, I just forgot to work on it. I’m looking forward to a personal project with less of a deadline next year. Any suggestions?

I was sure when I sat down to write this that the words would come spilling out. But instead, it’s a slow twisting motion to wring them from my heart. In some ways, I feel like I’m holding these memories close to my heart because I’m afraid if I share them, I’ll lose them. That is the silliest thing ever because I picked up a camera to be able to show other people the way I see the world.

I think I’m just going to pick photos that meant a lot to me and explain why. No rhyme, no reason… just staring at captured memories and remembering why they meant so much to me.

January

I didn't shoot much in January but I distinctly remember this. January was kind of a fight because I felt so sick and so scared. But I chose to take my camera and listen to "Swim" and take photos. This is the moment that prepared me to fly to Salt Lake City to meet (and photograph!) Jack's Mannequin.

February

My first success at 'street' photography. I saw the perfect composition and it was a race to get my settings right and get the shot before the moment was over. I think this is one of the first times I realized how much I can do intuitively now.

We went to Mai-Kai for my father's birthday. When it was time for the fire dance to be performed, an announcement was made about how flash photography was forbidden for the dancers' safety. While everyone else put their cameras away, I adjusted my settings accordingly (bumped the ISO, opened my aperture, and guessed at a shutter speed to capture light trails without overexposing) and captured some of the most amazing shots of the year.

March

March was a month of highs and lows. I had heart surgery, but I also had two awesome adventures.

My friend Corbin came down for spring break. It ended up being the weekend of my surgery so his visit was not at all what we thought it would be. But he loved the airboat ride and laying around, talking for hours. I enjoyed getting to see one of my favorite people in person.

I also went to Epcot in a wheelchair. I still haven't fully processed all the feelings I have about that trip: how it felt to be invisible or looked down upon by random strangers, how important it was to the Disney staff that I have a good time, the way my friend Erin cheered me on and helped me plan my adventure accordingly... It's taken me nine months to even share a photo of me in the wheelchair with you. We'll just say it was important and leave it at that.

April

This was my fully thought out first conceptual shoot. I started out doing it as an assignment for class but it grew into a big passion project of mine. I love the idea of exploring the darker side of fairy tales. This may become one of my back-burner projects for the next few years or so.

I photographed the Bar Mitzvah of a family friend. Whenever I see these photos in my slide show, I have a moment where I still can't believe that I took them.

May

Not every memory has to be a monumental moment. This is from a quiet night where I ran outside to capture the golden light.

I went to St. Louis to photograph Mattie and Jim's wedding. I recommend you read the original blog post.

And so begins a trend of taking photos out airplane windows...

June

I was invited along on the Cub Scout sleepover at MODS as the official photographer. I ended up sleeping in the coral cave. (If you look carefully in the photo on the left, you can see a sleeping bag.)

I photographed mom's Bat Mitzvah. It was crazy and hectic and stressful, but it was worth it. And it came together beautifully.

A peacock from Everglades Holiday Park, just because.

July

I love the Fourth of July. I just love fireworks, period.

I photographed a second birthday party for a shy little girl.

The day after Hayden's second birthday party, I photographed her cousin Lu's baby naming/first birthday. I love this photo because it's Lu, but also because it's the first time I played the "trust me, I'm the photographer" card and exceeded my expectations for myself. Also, window light and pancakes are amazing. That is all.

This is Layla, my best friend from preschool, dancing at her wedding. Her smile in the photo on the right was worth everything.

August

This is the first time I compared manual mode to program mode and realized how much work my camera does for me (and how wrong it can be sometimes).

I photographed my friend Kat and her sons, Preston (toddler) and Liam (baby). I love photographing her family because a) I love them and b) they let me run the show and do whatever.

I got to go to a sea turtle hatching release and it was AMAZING! No flash, no flashlights (except the red ones)... and somehow, I got this.

September

I got a job. It kind of cuts into my shooting time but I like it. And, I look somewhat professional.

I think I'm going to remember 2011 as the year I started shooting manual.

I love the autumn sunlight. On the beach. Because I live in South Florida. And just because it's there.

October

This photo itself isn't what's special; what it symbolizes is. I took a HUGE leap of faith and flew out to Salt Lake City for a little over 24 hours to photograph a charity event/go to a concert with Aunt Terri/feel alive again.

Yes, that is Andrew hugging me and talking to Aunt Terri. He was so genuinely happy to have a chance to meet with everyone in the group and was so surprised that Cancer Wellness House had survivor flags in his honor (which were presented to him). I'm tearing up again trying to write this. (The original post was a tearjerker too.)

They let us stay for sound check and I took pictures (which are now framed with my signed poster).

Aunt Terri drove me up into the mountains so I could play in the snow.

The first time I saw snow from the air. Hopefully not my last.

November

Doug and I got engaged.

December

Brotherface impressed me with his cello solo at the winter concert. I also photographed the first time orchestra, band, and the choir performed together. It may or may not end up hanging in the band wing.

Hanukkah cookies. One of my favorite family traditions. Need I say more?

What next year holds

-Tonight, Team Sandcastle is hosting a Rock Band New Year's Eve party. I also may toss together a 'photo booth'.
-I'm shooting a wedding in October.

This post has taken me three hours to write and I'm still not sure it accurately expresses the year but it will have to do. If I want to make memories, I need to step away from the screen.

See you in 2012.

may your holidays be sweet

2011-12-26T11:37:00.003-05:00

Just wanted to wish all my readers a happy holiday season and share some of my Hanukkah cookies with you.

winter concert

2011-12-18T20:11:00.003-05:00

Wednesday was my brother's winter concert. I was volunteered to take a photo for the band wing so I decided to just take photos throughout the entire thing. It was interesting because there was a guy in front of me, taking photos with his iPad and generally blocking the stage. So I just made it a game to shoot around him.

I'm kind of biased because my brother was playing but I think the Falcon Sound put on a good show. All 3 1/2 hours of it. (Ok, so I kind of wanted to leave after his first set but I was requested for the finale.)

I'm leaving you with this. I got kind of bored and threw my camera in rapid-fire mode during the Christmas medley that wouldn't end. Then I animated it.

what I've been up to

2011-12-10T22:11:00.003-05:00

I apologize for my absence but things have been a little crazy here. My computer has gradually been dying a slow and painful death. The integrated video card went bad, which gave me blue screens of death on top of keeping me from editing. So I did what any deranged person would do: I decided to build a new computer. And oh, how I love this new set-up. 8 gigs of RAM makes photo editing quick and smooth.

I haven't really taken too many photos since I last posted. We went and posed at the community Christmas tree on the way home from Thanksgiving.

And then last weekend, we went to the playground to try to get photos for a holiday card.

I'm disappointed that I dropped the ball when it came to Project 52. I made it strong until the end of the year but my computer's demise made it hard to keep up. Now it's time to start thinking about next year's photo project. Any suggestions?

fun at the fair

2011-11-27T16:57:00.004-05:00

For Doug's birthday, we went to the Broward County Fair. We went right around golden hour and stayed until dusk. Truthfully, there weren't a lot of rides I could go on. (I mean, there's a weight limit on the swings and Kaylee put me over. Let's not even get started on the heart.) If I hadn't brought my camera, it might have been a disappointment.

My favorite part was looking at the animals. We may have walked away, scheming about what we can have when we build the hobbit house.

Some things haven't changed since I was a kid. I still love the look and the smell of the fair.

And I always leave, having made a few new friends. These two were rescues and I wish there could have been mine. There's just something about being loved on by a sheep that makes everything wonderful. And being 'kissed' like crazy by a goat is just as joyful.

The only rides we cared about: the swings and the Ferris wheel. One out of two isn't bad; we rode the Ferris wheel and the Flying Bob's (backwards bobsled).

"I always wish for you..."

2011-11-16T22:37:00.000-05:00

I needed some time to think this through and figure out what I wanted to say. Those of you who are Facebook friends with me know that I got engaged last Friday. A few of you asked for the story and I just wasn't ready to tell it. I still don't know if I am but I think more time won't help me.

We've known since we first started dating that we wanted to spend our lives together. I don't think it was ever in question. I mean, he decided within a month of dating me that he wanted me to meet his entire family (in Ohio!). We were dating 4 months when he designed the engagement ring he wanted me to have.

About a year into our relationship, we went on a trip to Universal Studios. I ended up having a REALLY bad day and Doug would have done anything he could to make me smile. In an effort to cheer myself up, I put a quarter in one of the machines and out came a star ring. Doug decided to propose. I should really let him tell this part.

Brenda Heather: "When did you decide [you wanted to marry me]?"
Douglas Alexander: "When you told me that you loved me.
And again when you said no to my offering of the plastic ring, because you wanted to be smiling when you accepted a ring from me."

So he waited and schemed. He called every jeweler he could find that would do custom jewelry and no one would do what we wanted. Almost every night over the summer, while he was interning in Crestview and I was at home, we'd discuss the ring. One night, I got so frustrated with the jewelers being unwilling or unable to do what we wanted--or even to call us back--and I asked whether he'd rather push us the wedding tattoos and make them engagement tattoos instead. So we decided to put the majority of the ring budget into the tattoos, buy a tasteful ring for the proposal, and spend the rest on video games. I came up the end of July and we got our matching ampersand tattoos. [Pardon the cell phone photo.]

The day after I came home, the ring arrived. But I had to wait 3 1/2 months until I could have it.

We used to joke that we were going to elope on 11-11-11 before I got sick. Maybe if our lives had turned out differently, we would have. Probably not. Our compromise was to get engaged. I'm not very good with surprises so I'm impressed that I didn't see the ring beforehand. I sort of knew what it was going to look like because I suggested it to Doug and then magically, Etsy said it was no longer for sale. (I am really bad at surprises.) But I could not have imagined how much I love it.

The actual proposal isn't one of those Hollywood-style big deal proposals. I think if Doug had tried something like that, I would have run away and hid. We went to the beach, the same way we've done so many nights before. I love to stare at the sky and watch for shooting stars. We talked about how fabulous the harvest moon is and how perfectly the sea reflected it. We watched airplanes fly through the clouds and I kept my eyes peeled for a shooting star. And then he asked me. I can't remember exactly what he said; all I know is that it was simple and truthful. He wanted me to do him the honor of being his wife and I love that idea. I said yes and as I did, I think I saw a shooting star. But I can't be sure because it happened so fast. Plus, what more do I have to wish for? This was my wish and it came true.

My ring is a shooting star. It's silver and has a message hand-stamped on it. "And into Faerie..." The line from Stardust (my favorite love story) in which Tristran Thorn steps out of his everyday life and into an adventure. When we posted a picture on Facebook and I explained what it said, a friend of ours pointed out the secret meaning.

Brenda Heather: the ring reads "and into Faerie..." it's from Stardust, one of my favorite love stories ever.
Christie: in that case, you must be the shooting star represented on your ring

I hope that wasn't a spoiler for anyone.

After, we celebrated the way Team Sandcastle celebrates everything: with Tijuana Flats. (He let me pick. We did something fancy the next night.) What more did I need? I have my "always, forever, and a moose"; then I got hot sauce.

"...and all the lines we cast will bring us home"

2011-11-10T07:16:00.003-05:00

I was sad to leave Salt Lake City. I could have spent a week there and *still* felt like I needed more time to photograph everything. Heck, I needed more time just to breathe in the tranquility and the autumn-ness. But as it is, you're getting 4 blog posts from 2 days. I was so in my element.

I spent most of the flight home alternating between reading and taking pictures out the window. I think I'll always be amazed by the way everything looks from way up high and how different things are once I'm out of Florida/away from the ocean.

My connecting flight from Denver was delayed because of snow. But there was no snow by the window I was sitting at.

My last look at Denver. I could get used to views like this.

I knew before I even left which song would describe my trip. Obviously it's a Jack's Mannequin song. It conveys my wanderlust and my sense of home being where the people I love are perfectly.

"And we're still coming home, A thread through the unknown. All the lines we cast into forever got tangled like some wreckage in the road. A road we walked alone. But all the time that's passed held us together and all the lines we cast will bring us home." -Jack's Mannequin, "Casting Lines"

my whirlwind tour of Salt Lake City

2011-11-08T07:16:00.002-05:00

In hindsight, I may have been a tad insane to try to do this in 36 hours. We last left off with my first view of the mountains from the airport. From there, Aunt Terri picked me up and we went to the office for about an hour and then we were on our way to meet Andrew.

Of course, we had to park next to the photo collective.

The meet-and-greet with Andrew McMahon was phenomenal. If this was all I got out of the trip, I would be able to call it a success.

But there was more adventure to be had.

In between the meet-and-greet and the show, we went home to drop off my stuff and to let me see some more breathtaking views.

I also got to have the deliciousness that is Cafe Rio. (What can I say? She knows my taste in food.)

On our way to the show, we went a slightly longer way so I could see Temple Square lit up at night. It was beautiful. I *almost* (but not quite) wanted to skip the show to take more photos.

The next morning, I woke up bright and early. When I was planning the trip, I asked if there would be snow and Aunt Terri said if I got up early, we could drive up into the mountains for a little snow. I don't think I slept at all in anticipation.
We drove up through Big Cottonwood Canyon and all you could hear from the passenger seat was the *beep* of my autofocus, the click of the shutter, and me making excited sounds.

As we got closer to the top, I could see other mountains in the distance and it was wonderful.

But the best part had to be seeing snow on the ground as we drove by. The higher we got, the more visible the snow was. There wasn't a lot but it was enough for what I wanted.

As soon as we pulled into the parking lot of the ski lodge, I was out of the car and had my gloves on. If you look carefully, you can see a perfect snowflake on my glove.

Once I had the calm, peaceful, powdery shot, I decided to throw some up in the air and make it snow on myself.

We posed in front of the mountains and then we had to turn around and drive back down.

On the way down, we were talking about how the last time she was up that way, Aunt Terri saw a moose.

Then, I saw movement off in the grass on the other side of the road. So we pulled over and I sprinted across the road to photograph the moose. I didn't even change to my telephoto; I just ran.

Apparently we had a good idea because someone else pulled over to photograph the moose.

The rest of the ride back down was calm and pretty.

In honor of the moose and/or because we were always planning it, we went to the Red Moose for breakfast burritos and coffee.

Then all too soon, it was time to go back to the airport to fly home.

"these flights connect through Arizona but I think I'll stay stuck..."

2011-11-05T10:25:00.005-04:00

My trip started by watching the sun rise over the clouds. I was in heaven.

I kind of have an obsession with taking photos out the window. Since I couldn't get to my book, I spent the 5 hours of the first leg of my trip a little snap-happy.

The lyrics could not be more appropriate, since my connecting flight was in Phoenix. I had to sprint that airport. Then I fell asleep for most of my flight to Salt Lake City. I woke up and we were in a cloud.

This was my first view of Salt Lake City. It was breathtaking.

"I'm alive and I don't need a witness to know that I survived..."

2011-10-27T20:47:00.004-04:00

I'm struggling to find the words so please forgive me if this doesn't make sense. I'm blogging out of order because this is so important to me.

I flew out to Salt Lake City on Tuesday for a once in a lifetime opportunity. I was invited to be the staff photographer for Cancer Wellness House. Their teen and young adult survivor group was going to a meet and greet with Andrew McMahon (of Jack's Mannequin and Something Corporate), who is also a survivor. The second the offer was made, I knew I had to go. It was worth every moment.

From the second we met him, Andrew was so warm and wonderful. Not only did he read the blurbs about everyone, he remembered. One by one, every single person in our group got to talk to him. Yes, they talked about cancer but they also talked about life and passion and music. We all got signed posters, even me.

Andrew thanked me personally for flying out from Florida to take the photos. I just kept saying "no, thank you for giving me the chance." And when I told him about my heart, he just hugged me.

I didn't tear up until Aunt Terri went to present Andrew with what we brought him. As part of Survivors at the Summit, Cancer Wellness House has tribute flags hanging at the peak. Seeing as Aunt Terri is an even bigger fan that I am, there were flags in honor of Andrew. Watching him read the flags brought me to tears.

When it was time for the sound check, we were allowed to stay and it was amazing. I stood there and cried quietly behind my camera when they played "Swim" and just kept taking photos.

When we came back for the show, all of us were on the Jack's Mannequin list. We all hung out towards the back and I sat down for most of the show. I stood with Aunt Terri for the encore and it was amazing. I felt like me again.

**The title of this post is lyrics from "The Resolution" (by Jack's Mannequin, of course).

big dreams

2011-10-25T06:24:00.003-04:00

From the moment I got the email saying that she didn't think I could come but had to offer, I KNEW I HAD to go.

By the time this post goes live, I will be on my way to Salt Lake City, Utah. I am going to see Aunt Terri, one of my mom's closest friends. She works at a non-profit organization called the Cancer Wellness House and this afternoon, I will be photographing their young adult cancer survivor group. There is a guest speaker whom I admire a lot.
Yes, I took off work and spent half a paycheck to not sleep and meet Andrew McMahon of Something Corporate and Jack's Mannequin. I needed to do this. As Doug has pointed out, he hasn't seen me so happy in a long time.

I'll see you when I get home. I may even have some photos with me in them.

yesterdays and tomorrows

2011-10-23T18:05:00.003-04:00

I was hoping this post would do double duty and I could introduce you to my newest camera but it's Sunday so she's chilling at the post office. I probably won't be able to blog about her because I'll be blogging about... um... it's a surprise.

In the mean time, I have photos from the library yesterday. I went to the new building for the library I went to as a kid. I love it. The first floor has tons of windows so it's bright and cheerful. I loved it. I was also obsessed with the stained glass awning. I may have laid down on the ground to get a great photo with Ida.

I also spent a good few minutes 'chasing' these balloons, trying to get a shot where you could read what they say. I'd like to think that my friend Alexa is going to be able to cure cancer. (She's the mad scientist, I'm the crazy artist.)

I'm trying so hard to write coherent thoughts but all I can think of is being excited about my new camera and the adventures I am going to embark on this week.

crazy hair day [52:42]

2011-10-22T10:12:00.003-04:00

My mom brought me home a Neil Gaiman book so I had story time with my stuffed animals.

Actually, story time happened at midnight but I needed to recreate it this morning so I would have a project 52 entry.

I am trying so hard not to ruin any surprises on the blog but let's just say that there will be a few new and exciting posts soon.

on gratitude

2011-10-15T19:29:00.002-04:00

I greatly admire Christine and Alicia. They are my blog friends and they both inspire me so much. They post about their gratitudes and their struggles. The takeaway message I get is that my outlook affects my life.

Today, I've decided to share what I am grateful for. I've found that cheerfulness begets cheerfulness and I want my world to be sunshine as much as possible (except for when I'm dancing in the rain).

I am grateful for grapevine. It's my favorite native plant and it's overtaken my palm tree. Right now, it even has grapes on it.

I am also grateful for the wasp's great attitude. I managed to get a great shot without getting stung.

And as always, I am grateful for my camera. It lets me capture the world the way I see it and share it with you.

vintage camera love [52:40]

2011-10-06T19:31:00.004-04:00

This week was one of the easiest weeks for men (which is great, seeing as I missed last week.) The theme for the week was "a taste of vintage" and this camera certainly is tasty and vintage.

I've posted previously about this camera, the lovely Ida, but I never told you where she came from. Ida belonged to Grandma Ida and Grandpa Ralph, Doug's great-grandparents. When I was up in Ohio for Christmas, Doug's grandparents asked me if I wanted her. Once Great-Grandpa Ralph said okay, I brought her home with me and have carried her with me everywhere ever since.
Shooting with Ida makes me slow down and think. I carefully compose the shot, calculate exposure, and focus (which isn't easy). It's the opposite of the "I can fix it in post" attitude I occasionally get when I'm in a hurry. My first roll of film was 24 exposures, my current one is 36 and I haven't finished it yet. The love is in the taking of the photos and the surprise later when I open the envelope with the prints.

sun, surf, and sky

2011-10-02T13:36:00.000-04:00

I've been editing photos for this post for two weeks now. When I went to the beach last, I went a little overboard taking photos. I went because I missed the sea: the sight, the smell, the sound, the feel (but not the taste)... and I was only there an hour but managed to take about 200 photos. Oops.

I was pretty excited to see people parasailing. I would love to be able to take a camera up and have an amazing time. I actually have an underwater camera that I need to renovate so that next time, I can bring you photos from the sky.

It was a relaxing day. People were tanning, boating, sleeping, skating, swimming, kitesurfing... It was paradise for everyone.

I spent a few seconds trying to line up this shot and was so excited when I nailed it. It was a lucky break that the plane was going by.

As the cruise ship was leaving the port, a woman came over to try to take a photo of it with her iPhone. She asked why I wasn't taking a photo and I said I was waiting. She showed me her snap on her phone and then wandered off. I waited and was rewarded with this.

Here are the kitesurfers, coming in at the end of the day. I wish I had gone over and passed on the link to the blog. They were pretty awesome.

This is kind of strange but it makes me so happy. I cropped the photo and then edited it and added a texture. Then, I went back and pasted the final photo over the original shot.

I started writing this post when I got home from the beach but by the time I was done editing the photos, everything I wrote was outdated. So instead of me telling you my story, why don't you tell me what story you feel the photos are telling you?

kiss the rain

2011-09-24T18:38:00.002-04:00

I've been working on a blog post all day. Then, I heard rain falling outside. What's a girl to do?

I ran outside to play in the rain. So now you're getting this post instead.

This shot reminds me of some of the ones I took while experimenting with manual mode last time except much more organic and 'me'. (Yes, I shot in manual again today. I am proud of me.)

This was a lucky shot. My glasses were soaked and I couldn't see what my camera settings were so I just took a photo and hoped for the best. I almost never show shots straight out of camera but I just had to when I saw how dreamy this came out.

I also edited it because editing is fun for me.

To quote Alkaline Trio: "Did I run outside to kiss the rain under electrical skies?" I did. I try to every time it rains because this is what makes me feel alive. I am soaking wet and can't stop smiling. Isn't that how life should always be?

new eyes [52:38]

2011-09-24T00:48:00.001-04:00

I'm still editing photos from Sunday to give you a real post but I wanted to get my project 52 entry up before I missed the deadline. This week's theme is eyes and I just happened to have gotten new computer glasses for work today.

I promise I'll give you a real post soon.

60 second self portraits

2011-09-12T19:20:00.002-04:00

This "not shooting" and "not editing" thing (okay, *two* things) are driving me crazy. I feel like I'm only loving with half a heart. So... I got home from work today and did something about it. I wore a cute cami (tank top, for those of you who don't get help shopping) with a sweater and had my hair pulled back in a bun. Take down hair, toss sweater over chair, and dance around upstairs. While I was washing my hands, I noticed how cute I looked with my almost-straight hair (from the bun) and decided to take pictures of myself. These were all taken either in the mirror or MySpace-style but the point was to keep shooting, editing and blogging. These are who I am: a crazy girl who dances around the bathroom because she is so happy. And it only took me a minute to capture it.

thirst for knowledge [52:36]

2011-09-10T13:12:00.003-04:00

I set a bad precedent by giving myself the 'apology' tag.

I'm most likely going to be posting less frequently again. Hopefully I can get back to a more content-rich posting schedule soon but right now I'm adapting to a new job. That means I really only have time (and daylight) to shoot on the weekends. On the bright side, I'm learning about search engine optimization so I can try out what I learn on the blog.

Speaking of learning, I find it kind of funny that last week's theme for project 52 was thirst for knowledge and I was late getting my entry done because I was reading up for work.

This is my most random bookshelf. It has my reference books, things I read for school, and anything that wouldn't fit on my other shelves. It's also where most of the books I brought to photograph baby Liam came from.

lazy and crazy [52:35]

2011-09-03T09:00:00.003-04:00

This week's theme for project 52 is lazy so I'm using that as an excuse to have put off blogging it. It's not like I had a giant anniversary post to write and a 160 slide digital photo scrapbook to make or anything. (That was sarcasm. There needs to be a special symbol for it.)

If we want to be really technical, this photo doesn't epitomize laziness as much as it demonstrates caution when driving. I had a job interview and wanted to wear shoes that would make a good impression but they're floppy leather and I was afraid they'd hinder my driving. In true Brenda fashion, I wore my sneakers to drive, changed shoes in the parking lot, and then changed back before I drove home.

I'll stop being lazy now and get work shoes I can drive in (especially since at least one of my coworkers reads this blog).

two years ago today

2011-09-02T10:27:00.005-04:00

Last year's anniversary post is going to be a hard act to follow. (I would recommend reading it for the full story of our first year because I'm only going to hit the highlights.)

Two years ago today, Doug and I started dating. That sentence is factual but conveys nothing about what it means to be in love with him. For the past two years, we've chased our crazy dreams together. When things have gotten tough, he's stayed by my side so we could make it through together. Last night, we even had a contest to see who could write the mushiest thing to the other person on Facebook. He gets me in a way that no one else does.

We had been dating for about a month when he started planning to bring me home to his parents. Along the way, he also conspired with my best friend from preschool so that I could see her. We were only dating for three months when we drove up to Ohio to see his family and every day while we were there, he went out to play in the snow with me because I was enthralled by it.

For our six month anniversary, we did a Bioshock-themed photo session.

A few weeks shy of our one year anniversary, we had a photo shoot with Savor Photography. While the shoot was technically a Mother's Day present for my mom, there are a few super cute photos of Doug and I because we cuddled pretty much any chance we got.

Our one year anniversary was so great that we are planning on reprising it tonight. Tijuana Flats, cupcakes, and dancing barefoot in the grass may not be everyone's idea of a romantic evening but to us, it's perfect.

The second year of our relationship has been slightly different. Sometimes I wonder how it is that he can still love me so much after I've dragged him on some of our crazier adventures. We followed in the footsteps of the Barefoot Mailman, which ended with Doug having to ride home on a yellow couch in the back of a minivan.

I surprised him with a photo shoot with David McNeil, who made us out to be rockstars.

We went to Universal Studios, Islands of Adventure, and the Magic Kingdom during the holiday madness so our parents could finally meet. Within half an hour of everyone meeting, we were operating as though we were one big family.

We explored Coral Cove with Seth and Lexa and I finally got to show him what I love so much about Jupiter's beaches.

We even went to Mai-Kai for my father's 50th birthday. (The photo below was taken by my stepmom.)

As you can see, this year's recap is not nearly as eventful as our first year's. For much of this year, I've had medical problems which have made my life more difficult. I actually had a procedure in March to correct an electrical issue with my heart. If the hospital had let him, I honestly think he would have spent the night with me.

A few weeks later, we went to Epcot. I worried leading up to the trip that I would hold him back and keep him from being able to see everything he wanted to; he responded by christening my wheelchair a "mobile photography unit" and pushing me around the park.

He loves me enough to help me dye my hair, uproot invasive plants, and dance on the roof of parking garages with me.

At the end of the day, these are the things that let me know that I am with the right person. He just gets me.

He went back to Crestview for the summer to intern at his local library. I didn't get to see him much but we spoke to each other online every single night. When he came down in June, we slept over the Museum of Discovery and Science.

The last time I saw him was a month ago. I flew up to the Panhandle to go to my best friend from preschool's wedding and while we were there, we got matching tattoos. I don't know how to put into words what they mean to me, let alone what they mean to him. In the simplest explanation, our ampersands are a sign of our commitment to each other. Doug & I are two halves of a whole.

But it's more than that. They're a visual reminder that every day, even when I don't see him, he loves me and I love him back. It's a source of strength I can draw on when I need an extra boost.

The ampersand also holds an extra meaning for me. There's a line from an Amanda Palmer song that has stuck with me since the day I first heard it: "I'm not gonna live my life on one side of an ampersand." One of the strengths of our relationship is that we both have identities defined by more than just each other. I'm not just Doug's girlfriend; I'm a wonderful person lucky enough to be in love with Doug.

I feel like I've said so much less than in last year's entry, but I've also said so much more. This is what I left on his wall in the early morning hours today and it sums up the way I feel about my life with him in it.
"For the past two years, you've been with me for better and for worse. Through the highs and the lows, you've been by my side with encouragement and kisses. The way you look at me, the way you stand by me, the way you *get* me in a way no one else seems to... I wouldn't trade it for anything and I don't know where I'd be without it. Thank you for being the one who chases my crazy dreams with me and loves me unconditionally. May the years to come be better than the years that have passed and may we weather every storm that comes our way together.
Always, forever, and a moose."

blue skies, happy hearts, next 100 miles

2011-08-26T17:36:00.004-04:00

These end of summer, transitioning to autumn skies have the most lovely shades of blue. Whenever I am in the car, I am pressed to the window with my camera, just watching the clouds go by and hoping I can capture the way I feel.

This week, we managed to get a little lost on the way to visit a friend and managed to pass the airport a few times, with a plane landing each time. I was in heaven.

Days like today, I just want to soak up the sunshine and squirrel it away for those cold January mornings.

connection [52:34]

2011-08-26T08:49:00.000-04:00

This weeks's theme for project 52 is connections. Sometimes I honestly forget how many great friendships I've forged... until I see my friends doing things like this to make sure I have a photo for the week.

world photography day 2011

2011-08-19T20:27:00.002-04:00

Today is World Photography Day. I probably wouldn't have known if I didn't have twitter, but all my photo friends are excitedly tweeting about it. Not to mention, there's a photo contest going on today to win an awesome camera bag. I'll admit that Scarlett and Stephen gave me an extra incentive to write this post. ;)

Lately I've been shooting less and working on being more precise with my photography. While agonizing about settings will make me a better photographer in the long run, it takes away some of the passion from the day-to-day. I carry my camera with me everywhere but I don't take nearly as many pictures as I used to.
Today, I decided to take a step backwards and reevaluate what made me love photography so much in the first place: it provides me with the opportunity to share the way I see the world with other people. That's why I'm glued to my camera all the time; that's why I blog. Sometimes, I swear that's what I live for.
As I was contemplating what I wanted to photograph, my house was filled with a strange quality of light. I looked out the window and then ran to get the camera. The colors of the sky after a stormy day in South Florida are unreal. With the exception of a slight boost in contrast and a touch of sharpening (because I don't let my camera do that for me), this is straight out of camera. I shot in program mode so Kaylee (my 50D) picked the settings. I couldn't be bothered to fidget with my camera; I just wanted to marvel at the sunset. This is what photography is to me and it's what I should be celebrating today.

baby sea turtles [52:33]

2011-08-18T22:01:00.002-04:00

Last night, I finally got the chance to attend a sea turtle hatchling release. It was an amazing, once-in-a-lifetime experience.
Because the baby turtles find the ocean by heading towards the brightest light (the moon reflecting off the waves), we weren't allowed to have any lights. The staff running the release had red LED flashlights but otherwise, it was pitch black. I bumped my ISO, focused manually, steadied my arms, and hoped.

This is the only photo that was in focus and properly exposed.

double brother trouble

2011-08-15T18:13:00.002-04:00

On Thursday, I finally got to meet Mr. Liam and take his picture. The last time I formally photographed his family, it was just his mom, dad, and Preston. But now, Liam has joined the party and is stealing hearts as easily as his big brother.

Originally, I was supposed to photograph Liam as a teeny, tiny newborn. But his stay in the NICU, followed by family plans on both sides, meant that I didn't get to see him until now. Sadly, he's outgrown his desire to sleep through everything and that made posing him a little bit harder. We tried to put him in a basket and he just wasn't interested; he'd rather look around.

As long as he could look at us or out the window, he was happy.

Part of the shoot was planned around an awesome photo I found on another photographer's blog. (Thanks CALIMA portraits! If you see this, we should be friends.) Kat and I went to the Honors College together and she wants to be a librarian, so how could be not pose her baby among our books?

It's no coincidence that Bright From the Start is the book under his head; he's going to be super smart.

Once Liam went to sleep, I decided to have a little fun with Preston. He was so good the entire time, climbing around to help us. You can tell he loves his baby brother. Since his brother got lots of cute pictures, he deserved some too.

In true Brenda fashion, I decided to throw caution to the wind and have Preston jump on the bed... with all of us grown-ups. I even jumped on the bed with my camera in hand to catch him in mid-air.

Earlier in the day, we tried to get Preston to sit on the books so we could get a photo of him holding Liam and he wouldn't do it. Right before I left, he decided he was going to sit on the books and read to Horton and I.

Storytime is serious business to Mr. Preston.

A few posts back, I mentioned that I wanted to get better at shooting in manual mode. With the exception of a test shot to see what the depth of field was with my lens, every single shot was in manual mode. While there were some outtakes where the settings were off, especially the focus, the majority of the shots came out wonderfully. I did have a few laughable mishaps with setting my shutter speed to sync with my flash, but it was all in good fun.

I'm not there yet but I'm certainly learning.

calm before the storm [52:32]

2011-08-12T21:38:00.002-04:00

The title is appropriate. This week's project 52 theme is "my favorite time of day" and I happen to have caught a break in the clouds, right before a torrential downpour.

The title is also metaphorical, in that I am going to flood the blog with photos as soon as I finish editing them.

simplicity is key

2011-08-07T00:15:00.001-04:00

Patience is something that I'm not very good at. Once I get excited about something, asking me to wait feels like being forcibly held back. I just blogged about shooting manually an hour ago and now I'm blogging the rest of the photos from my walk.
I just walked around the house. It's not like I went on a grand adventure, yet I am as happy as if I was wandering in a forest far away. The simplicity of the shots, just some raindrops and where they gather, is relaxing to me. The simple processing in Photoshop that accents but doesn't overwhelm the subject matter is calming. I couldn't wait to share these because of how happy they make me.

manual mode

2011-08-06T23:33:00.001-04:00

I will be the first to admit that shooting in manual mode is daunting. I never know where to begin and I'm always afraid of missing my shot because I'm fidgeting with settings. When I'm shooting something that matters, I shoot in aperture priority mode and use exposure compensation to get the exposure the way I imagine it. In theory, I could shoot manually and adjust the RAW file in post-production, but that doesn't feel right to me. So I don't shoot manual often. But the only way to get better at something is to do it. Practice, practice, practice.

It was drizzling outside but the light was lovely. Raindrops were dripping off all the leaves and as soon as one fell, another took its place. There was no stress because I was shooting for myself.
I took a walk around my house, playing with the manual settings on my camera. I started in program mode and many of my shots were keepers because Kaylee (my camera) knows my taste well. But there were some that were just bleh. The lighting conditions fooled the meter and I couldn't get satisfied with those shots. I looked at the settings Kaylee had chosen and used them as a starting point for a manual exposure.

For ease of comparison, all shots were processed using the same action (Color Flare from MCP Actions' Quickie Collection), sharpened, and resized. I had to resist the urge to adjust them otherwise. And yes, I know the composition isn't exactly the same for all of them. I fidget a lot, remember?

top: P, f/5.6, 1/100, ISO 500, 55mm
bottom: M, f/5.6, 1/200, ISO 1000, 55mm

I liked the exposure that my camera set but I wanted to freeze the water droplets running off the roof so I upped my shutter speed and ISO to compensate.

top: P, f/5.6, 1/50, ISO 1600, 53mm
bottom left: M, f/5.6, 1/64, ISO 1600, 53mm
bottom right: M, f/5.6, 1/50, ISO 1600, 53mm

I loved the top shot and wanted to keep the settings to get a few more. I walked closer to the tree so I could keep the same settings and focus on the leaf. Then I stepped back to where I stood for the original shot and slowed the shutter speed a smidge to let in just a little more light.

top: P, f/5.6, 1/100, ISO 400, 55mm
bottom: M, f/5.6, 1/100, ISO 800, 55mm

This one is like night and day. I loved my composition but the original shot was so dark. I bumped the ISO up a lot to let in a lot more light and suddenly, I was in love with the shot.
I kept the f/5.6, 1/100, ISO 800, 55mm and managed to get these lovely shots, just pulling back slightly to change the composition.

top: M, f/5.6, 1/100, ISO 800, 55mm
bottom: M, f/5.6, 1/64, ISO 800, 55mm

I kept the settings from the previous photos but it was a little too dark so I slowed down my shutter speed a touch and it was perfect.

While I am nowhere near proficient with shooting manually (yet), I have to admit that those shots have a quality to them that I love.

on best friends, memories, and new stories

2011-08-03T11:14:00.003-04:00

I started my adventure as I always do, with a window seat so I could watch the sky and try to guess what city is below me.

My flight to the Panhandle was by way of Kentucky and I wish I could have captured the fairgrounds next to the airport but sadly, electronic devices have to be off for take-off and landing. But I did take some pictures at the airport before we whooshed off again towards Doug, who was waiting for me in Fort Walton.

I sat directly over the wing, so I could see as we broke through the clouds.

Here's where I realize how disjointed and nonsensical this narrative is going to be. I have pictures of parts of the journey, but other moments were not documented. There are no pictures of Doug and I embracing at the airport or jumping onto the bed the second we walked through the door. I have a photo of the awesome goggles I got at a yard sale, but no photos of the antique scale or giant wooden chest we couldn't afford.

Although I should probably be thankful I didn't bring my camera on our Blackwater River adventure because that was kind of a disaster. Between bottoming out on the shallows, getting stuck on submerged logs, and a "two hour trip" just barely getting us back before the sun set, I don't think I want to have visual reminders of that.

The reason I flew up was for Layla's wedding in Pensacola. She and I have been friends since we were in preschool and it was a privilege to be there when she and Brian made it official and magical.
I love taking pictures as Doug and I drive out to Pensacola. The bridges are always beautiful and the streets have an old charm that home just doesn't have.

The wedding itself was beautiful. You could see Layla's personality in all the details. I don't have words for this...

first dance:

father-daughter dance:

One of the oh-so-Layla details was the fan. It was a really hot day and we all needed them. Of course, Doug and I couldn't resist taking pictures of each other playing with the fans while the bridal party had their formal portraits done.

We took the scenic route on the drive home. The wedding ended earlier than we had expected and the sunlight was gorgeous and we were both so overcome with love and whimsy and it just seemed like we needed an adventure.

The clouds were unreal.

We took the long way home and smiled for miles.

This shot was a happy accident. I slid down in my seat so I could get the water tower as we drove by and the tint strip on the top of the windshield worked like a graduated filter.

We stopped off to check out where something was in Fort Walton and I found this little white chapel. We just had to have a picture of me in my white wedding dress (ha!), standing outside.

Then, it was back on the road. We were surrounded by darkness and it was the most amazing feeling to see how tiny we are in the grand scheme of things. I felt like I had a star's-eye view -- although that may have been related to reading Stardust on the trip.

And as many of our adventures end, we spent much time at Sonic with root beer floats.

I feel like this entry is missing a lot. But how do you photograph how it feels to burrow into your love's arms while you sleep? Or the way it feels to beat a level of a video game by yourself for the first time? The memories appear to be mine and Doug's and I think I'm okay with keeping them for ourselves. Consider this a postcard, not a letter or a journal.

I'm off!

2011-07-28T10:50:00.000-04:00

Any opportunity I have to use my "away on adventure" tag, I try to. This time, I'm returning to the Panhandle for a wedding (which I don't have to photograph), my mister, and plenty of random photos.

Luckily, I don't have to bring this much film. See you when I get back.

B [52:30]

2011-07-26T17:57:00.002-04:00

I've had this pin floating around my room for a while. I want to say my grandma got it for me. I finally decided to paint it and make it a little more me, just in time for this week's theme to be "a letter of the alphabet".

water [I heart faces]

2011-07-25T11:37:00.002-04:00

This week's theme over at is water. I couldn't resist bringing back an old favorite.

Not pictured is how soaking wet I got trying to demonstrate to Melinda how I wanted her to pose.

double cousins weekend

2011-07-23T10:11:00.004-04:00

Last weekend, I had the honor of photographing TWO beautiful birthdays back to back. Both girls were cousins and I was asked to photograph their parties by their 'grammy' (my auntie). Before I had both events on my calendar, I just had the baby naming because her mother asked me specifically what it would cost to have me do that for her. I'm tearing up just writing this because I was so honored that she looks at my work and wants to have it in her life.

Since I don't want to make myself cry with the mushiness of how my family loves each other, I thought I would share commentary on what was going on in my head, both as I was shooting and editing. The way I choose what to blog is based just as much on my emotional response as the technical aspects. While I have plenty of technically proficient shots, the ones that catch my eye and wow me the most are the ones that get saved in my 2011 folder and then I pick my favorites from those to blog. Just know that what you're seeing are my favorite moments and the ones that I want to see every time my screen saver kicks in.

Saturday night was a second birthday party at a pizza place. And what would a party be without balloon animals?

I was warned in advance that the birthday girl does not like to be photographed so I warmed her up by taking pictures of her friends. They were super cute and loved my camera (and me).

Eventually, she warmed up to my camera. But much of the night, people were trying to get her attention and kept distracting her so it was difficult to get good photos. Plus, the lighting was an awful color. So when I converted these photos to black and white, I had an "aha!" moment. This is the calm, happy girl who was hiding under the slightly overwhelmed one in front of me.

These shots were done this way on purpose. I've always loved the way some photographers focus on something in the foreground and allude to the person/people having a great time in the background. Plus, the Sesame Street cake was pretty cute.

Once we got her back to the house, away from the chaos, she became a completely different girl. She was completely calm and at ease, interested in both her presents and the people sitting with her. After going through all the awful ones in the restaurant, with the bad lighting and blurry arms of intruding family members, these were a relief. I was grinning nonstop and could not wait to share them.

Happy second birthday, lovely. I already have a glimpse of the butterfly you are becoming.

Sunday was a baby naming brunch at the Cheesecake Factory. I took many more pictures on Sunday than I did on Saturday but I'm more picky about what I share. These photos are all definitive moments where you can see the love in the frame or feel it radiating in from off-camera. At the risk of sounding mushy and making myself tear up again, we were there to watch the birthday girl be blessed and given a Hebrew name, but we were also there to witness how blessed we are to have such a great community. (Ok, so I'm tearing up.)

I also managed to get a few photographs of her cousin, now that she has learned to love my camera.

Just when I sat down to eat, I was requested to come over and photograph her eating a pancake. She was so happy to share her pancake with me and I love these photos. When I was editing and got to these, I let out a squee of joy. Not only are they super cute but her mom took my advice and sat her facing a window so the lighting is breathtaking and her eyes look unreal.

I was going to post the cupcake photo but they were nice enough to write her name on the plate and I'm trying to protect her privacy. You'll just have to imagine how she dug into her cupcake, everyone else enjoyed their cheesecake, and the party ended on a sweet note.

postcards from home [52:28]

2011-07-22T23:11:00.000-04:00

This is a slightly different post than what I usually write but it's the best way to tell this story.

Dear Lauren,
I got your postcard today.

I already sent you one so instead, I'm writing you a letter on my blog. You promised when you come home, we can shoot our special reserve rolls of film together. In the mean time, I thought I'd make use of my digital camera to show you how home misses you.

The sky tonight was pink and purple as the day changed into night and it was lovely and I wish I could have bottled it up and mailed it to you. But this will have to do.

just a rainbow

2011-07-21T00:10:00.002-04:00

I saw this rainbow as we were driving to dinner tonight and I figured it would be something nice to share with the blog while I finish editing photos from the weekend.

See? I totally love being home.

props and fairy tales [I heart faces]

2011-07-18T12:27:00.002-04:00

I blogged this photo once before when I first shot it but I felt it deserved to be showcased again, especially since I eventually want to print this on a giant canvas and display it proudly. The sleeping beauty shoot was originally an assignment for an art class but it took on a life of its own. I've always loved the story.

This week's theme over at is props and this photo just would not be the same without any of the props. The princess brought the drop spindle and we dyed the roving together. I found the broken tiara on the side of the road on the way to where we shot all the photos. The fake blood is made of corn syrup and red food coloring. Simple, small details MAKE this shot for me. That, and my friend was willing to sacrifice her beautiful purple dress to make a fairy tale come to life.

cupcake love

2011-07-15T00:30:00.003-04:00

I really have no idea how to categorize this but I just had to blog it. I probably should have started this post hours ago but I was busy being followed around by a snake.
Before the snake decided I was exciting, I had been doing a happy dance because I got a care package in the mail from Miss Alexa. When she's not blogging about being a professional fangirl or spinning cotton candy fluff into yarn for me, she crochets (and sometimes knits) amazing things. Today's amazing surprise, tossed in with the yarn she made me, was a crocheted cupcake garland. So much cuteness, so much love, have to share.

Pardon me while my brain continues to be mush. At least it's shiny, right?

sweet relief [52:28]

2011-07-13T13:24:00.002-04:00

This week's theme for project 52 is 'sweet relief' so when I got the text asking if I wanted to go to Jaxson's, I knew I was going to be able to make deadline (and also, yum!).
On the way there, I took pictures out the window as we drove by the airport. We had perfect timing and I got to see both takeoff and landing.

While I was afraid to have my camera out while we were digging in and therefore missed the GIANT goblet my stepbrother ordered, I did take a few pictures of the interior and the sign.

It was pretty sweet.

fireworks and fun

2011-07-06T15:14:00.003-04:00

This is going to be a really long blog post. I'll try to keep the words short and sweet and the fireworks plentiful.

I wasn't planning on going out for the Fourth of July but my aunt called and promised me a comfy chair, cute twins, and lots of fireworks. Since I'm trying to get out and take photos more, I decided I would go. We went to Fort Lauderdale Beach and I had a lot of fun shooting out the window while we were trying to find a parking spot. I love the way so much of Fort Lauderdale is old enough to have character.

When we got to the beach, I took a few photos of the boats and the boys and then settled into my chair. No need to overexert myself. Plus, I needed to set up my tripod (which wasn't completely level, no matter what I did).

The fireworks were lovely. I could see in the distance the display on Hollywood Beach to the south and whatever city was to the north. I also got a kick out of the kids with glow sticks because you can see them on the shore in some of my shots.

There were a few scary moments like when someone's bottle rocket backfired but for the most part, it was pretty awesome and lots of fun.

I'm in power for the hour

2011-07-04T17:37:00.003-04:00

The full title should be "I'm in power for the hour. I guess today's gonna blow us away." I was listening to Something Corporate in the car the other day and it stuck in my head.

All these pictures were taken in about half an hour, on a boardwalk behind the library. But it was important to me that I blog them, just as it was important to me to take them.

I'm trying to get back into the habit of shooting and blogging. I've missed it and I think it missed me. I'm trying to gear up for adventure. Stay tuned.

at the farmer's market

2011-07-03T22:56:00.002-04:00

Today, we were driving down the road when we saw a giant chicken. Me, being the photo junkie I am, insisted we turn the car around so I could see it. And that was how we discovered the Southwest Ranches Farmer's Market. I didn't take too many photos because I got distracted by the bunch of bananas we ended up buying. But I couldn't resist snapping some shots of the interesting signs.

In addition to the signs were fridges and freezers and bins galore, all full of beautiful fruits and vegetables. It was a lovely stop on the way home.

in my own backyard

2011-06-30T23:28:00.002-04:00

My last few posts have mentioned my love of rain. It's no secret that when I hear the raindrops pelting my window, I want to throw my shoes off and run outside. Barefoot, twirling in the rain and wind, laughing towards the sky... That's what makes me happy.
Wandering around with my camera, photographing tiny orbs of crystal perched on every surface is magical too.

So many people mistakenly believe that they have to travel, to go *somewhere*, in order to experience something beautiful. My adventure begins in my own backyard.

April, alligators, and airboats

2011-06-29T00:51:00.004-04:00

Yesterday (technically the day before, but I haven't slept yet), April and I decided to be tourists in our own neighborhood. We went to Everglades Holiday Park. The last time I was there was right after surgery, so I didn't take too many photos. This time, my camera and I spent a little too much time together.

The second we got there, April and I were greeted by peacocks. It's mating season so all the males were putting on quite the show and chasing the females around.

Once I finished photographing/being attacked by the peacocks, we bought our tickets and waited at the dock for our airboat to depart. Before our boat had even arrived, we saw gators.

Then, there was a cute little gator who got super close to the boat. I say 'little' because he was about 4 feet long and still playful like a juvenile. He let our boat captain scratch him behind the ears.

The view was lovely and we got to see a bunch of gators.

This guy was my favorite. He followed the boats to their turtle traps and stole the turtles for his lunch.
My immediately reaction was to want to free him from the ropes. But being full doesn't mean he wouldn't still bite if he felt threatened.

When we returned to shore, we watched the gator show. I'm always impressed by how knowledgeable and passionate the staff is. The guy we had this time is an environmental studies major specializing in crododilians. Boy after my own heart.

Things got kind of touristy when people actually paid to pose on a gator. I'd never seen anyone do it before. Bonus points because the guys were all full of (false) bravado but it was a teenage girl and a grandmother who actually did it.

Then, I got April to pose with the gator bites sign and her box o' bites to be super touristy.

Can you believe this is virtually in my backyard?

Marty McFly Monday

2011-06-27T01:45:00.002-04:00

Yesterday, there was a really cute bee hitching a ride on the windshield. I posted a photo but said nothing. If you clicked through to the photo on flickr, I made a kind of silly joke. Then, I mentioned off-hand to Doug that since I felt guilty about not posting, I might throw together a Marty MyFly Monday -- a one time feature for my little windshield buddy.
Since I can't sleep at the moment, I'm trying to put together this blog post. I'm running into some difficulties since I've never actually seen Back to the Future (and the only reason the name popped into my head was a Facebook event in the sidebar). But since the middle of the night is great for half-thought-out posts, I'd like to introduce you to Marty.

He hitched a ride on our windshield home from the grocery store.

He posed for a photo session.

He 'held' my hand.

He's pretty cute and photogenic and I hope he's happy in my grapevine.

another beautiful day in paradise

2011-06-26T17:36:00.003-04:00

In my last post, I said that I lived for the rain. So today, I got a lovely rainy day and I could not be happier.

It's just another beautiful day in paradise for me.

I crave rain [52:25]

2011-06-24T16:44:00.005-04:00

This time of year, most people around here are craving sunshine. I live in sunny South Florida, home to a cult of sun worshipers. Being tan is the goal to strive towards and the summer sun gives them what they need, along with a dose of vitamin D.
But I crave the rain. The feel of the raindrops refreshing my skin, the rolling thunder in the distance, the lightning shows I can watch from my window... I also love the diffused light when it's drizzling. Water droplets + rain cloud softbox = beautiful photographs.

I spend my afternoons waiting for the clouds to roll in and the skies to open up.

tasty treat [52:24]

2011-06-16T21:29:00.002-04:00

This week's theme is make it tasty and so I decided to be all decadent and have a red birch beer for dinner.

Don't you pick your meals based on how photogenic they are?

night at the museum

2011-06-15T22:42:00.000-04:00

Friday night, Doug and I were invited to sleep over at the Museum of Discovery and Science with the cub scouts. In the course of 12 hours, I took 400 photos. Even after cutting them down as best I could, this post is still going to be monumental.

We started the evening wandering around the floor, exploring the exhibits at our leisure. Doug and I started with the baby loggerhead sea turtle.

Experiment time in the lab. I sat with Aunt Mar and one of the dads, which is why we managed to win the diaper absorption challenge with 600mL.

I stayed with the twins' group for the underwater tour and the activities.

We got turned loose again while the kids watched Night at the Museum 2, so of course Doug and I spent half an hour playing with bubbles.

We explored until 12:20.

When it was lights out, we slept among the fish tanks. It was amazing!

I didn't want to say goodbye when it was time to go.

The last thing I did was toss on my fisheye to get a few shots of the great gravity clock.

reality [52:23]

2011-06-09T21:25:00.003-04:00

I was so excited because this week's theme for project 52 was enchantment and I was going to do a fae self-portrait and it was going to be so amazing and... life happened. My last post was written while I was waiting for news from the ER about brotherface. This week has been spent working on getting him better and getting him home.

Since the past 2 Mondays have had us alternating trips to the ER, I decided the best photo to represent this week was our two hospital bracelets together. Because we're both watching tv and taking painkillers and that is better than pretending to be a princess.

some days

2011-06-05T21:18:00.002-04:00

Some days, everything refuses to go according to plan. Things get tough, no one feels well, people have a hard time communicating/getting along, the small things turn out to be bigger than you thought, and all you can do is this.

But the good news is that tomorrow will be much better. And in the mean time, all my readers can commiserate and/or laugh at my completely unmade bed. Either way is fine by me.

reflection [52:22]

2011-06-02T21:39:00.003-04:00

As much as I wanted to plan out a complex portrait set-up for this week's theme, sometimes simplicity is best. The sky looks even prettier when seen reflected in a puddle because the context reminds me to look up from the ground.

brotherface's concert

2011-06-02T00:24:00.003-04:00

I went to my little brother's spring recital tonight. He did an absolutely amazing job and I am so proud of him.

Unfortunately, my camera's low battery indicator wasn't clear enough and I thought I could make it through his performance before I needed to recharge. While holding the battery in the palm of my hand and hoping allowed me to squeeze out an extra 10 shots, my camera was still dead by the time the finale came around. It's a shame because the cello section leader--my brother's mentor and friend--got really choked up during his introduction and I swear brotherface shed a few tears himself. And then the two boys really launched into it and played their cellos with an energy I've never seen before. You'll just have to imagine it while I'm kicking myself for not charging my camera.

the rest of the adventure

2011-05-27T22:02:00.002-04:00

Two blogs in one day? It seems weird but I wanted to make sure my project 52 entry was up on time. I already covered the wedding in detail but I took some other pictures on the trip.

I started my trip with two flights: one to Atlanta and then a connecting flight to St. Louis. I managed to get window seat so I could watch the sun rise from the airplane. (I wrote about my love of mid-air sunrises before I left.)

As I was landing in Atlanta, I got this shot out the window. It struck me as profound and something I HAD to capture but I'm not entirely sure why.

I already blogged the wedding and there's nothing to show from the bachelor/ette party.

The day after the wedding, Mattie took me to the Laumeier sculpture park. One of Jim's friends came with us and at one point, he let me try out his 5DMkII.

Those are my favorite photos from the excursion, and not just because of the camera. I honestly do not understand art sometimes. For example, why use bleachers as part of your piece if you do not want anyone to touch them?

That isn't to say that I didn't love some of the pieces. This one made me so happy.

These did too.

Mattie had posed me on the last sculpture because the side we were on didn't have a sign. So I figured once we had already broken the rules (unknowingly), I might as well enjoy myself and get a picture of Mattie with the sign.

On the flight home, I got window seat from St. Louis to Atlanta. I got to see the river (I'm not sure whether it was the Mississippi or the Missouri) and some really fluffy clouds.

I got to watch the sun set over Atlanta.

Mattie and Jim are married

2011-05-27T10:35:00.003-04:00

After being super nervous about shooting their wedding, I can honestly say that this was the best way to ease in and try out being a 'pro' photographer. I've known Mattie since I was a freshman in college and she's always made me feel more confident about myself; meeting Jim just added to the list of people who make me braver and better. I could go on and on about how much I adore Mattie and Jim but it should be obvious by now. I still have a hard time believing that they like my work enough to fly me out to St. Louis to shoot their wedding but apparently they do. Jim is a photographer himself so I know what a big deal it is for him to choose me.

Their wedding was held at the Old Playground Pavilion in Tower Grove Park.
Her dress (for the ceremony) was her grandmother's and every woman in her family is given the opportunity to wear it.
The ceremony was officiated by their friend, Claudia. Mattie and Jim met when Claudia hired him to photograph her wedding.

We started off doing portraits so everyone could relax and eat after the ceremony.

Nervously waiting for the ceremony to start.

With the rings secure on their fingers and not lost in the grass, they were pronounced husband and wife.

Our friend Randi and her mister, Brad, drove up from the Panhandle with their swords. They gave Mattie and Jim a sword arch to walk through and something fun to cut the cake with.

Brad sabered the champagne for the toast.

The wedding was beautiful and I am so glad I got the honor of photographing it.

party time [teaser]

2011-05-24T04:40:00.002-04:00

I got back from St. Louis a few hours ago and immediately launched into working on the pictures. I was just so excited about seeing them on a big screen. I figured you might be too so I thought I'd share a sneak peek of what happens when I promise Mattie I'll wear a skirt.

I promise I'll write a few full posts in the coming days, once I've slept.

watching the sun rise from above the clouds

2011-05-20T06:15:00.002-04:00

One of my favorite tags on this blog is "away on adventure" and for good reason. There is just something special about being out of town/away from home. I wrote this post ahead of time and scheduled it to go up around the time my flight is supposed to take off, bringing me to St. Louis. It's been a while since I've flown but I still remember how amazing it was to watch the sun rise from above the clouds.

Sadly, I have aisle seat on all my flights so I can't take photos out the window, but I'll survive.

This weekend, I'll be shooting my second wedding. (Kat and Derek's was my first.) I'm pretty nervous, especially since the groom is a photographer himself.

sunrise and butterflies [52:20]

2011-05-17T16:26:00.004-04:00

Many years ago, my cousin was selling holiday gifts through school and tucked in the back of the catalog was a set of butterfly window clings. I saw them and immediately decided that they would be perfect on my east-facing window. Even now, cracked and faded, the butterflies add a special touch to my view of fluffy clouds and tree tops.
Last night, when I couldn't sleep, I got a rare opportunity: to watch the sun rise through the butterflies. I rarely see the sunrise because I'm a night owl and therefore sleep right through it. But last night, I absolutely could not fall asleep. So I got to watch the sun rise this morning before I finally dozed off.

As I watched the sun peek through, I realized that I had the perfect photo for my project 52. This is springtime. This is the world waking up after a long, cold winter (although not in Florida). And this is exquisite happiness, especially to a sleep-deprived mind.

Watching the golden sunlight play on every surface of my room was absolutely wonderful. Maybe I should wake up early more often and go play in the sunshine somewhere, soaking up its golden shine. Anyone for a beach day?

combating the darkness [52:19]

2011-05-14T13:22:00.003-04:00

Another last minute project 52 entry, just barely making deadline. Oh self, what am I ever going to do with you?

This week's theme is window light, which I have been avoiding like the plague. I have a lovely east-facing window so I can wake up to a beautiful morning. I also have had a lovely side effect from the steroids that keeps me up until almost sunrise, which makes me want to hide under the covers forever when I finally get to sleep. So basically, I have not been putting my window to good use. But this morning I noticed that my windowsill has exactly what I need to make my world happy: sunshine, a purple lightsaber, and a good book.

my favorite time of day

2011-05-13T13:46:00.003-04:00

I have been saving these photos for a day when I really would rather not be awake. When I feel like I could use some time off from my life, I just have to look at these photos to remember why I'm here.

I wrote this as my Facebook status on Tuesday, right before I ran outside to take these photos:
"Dear golden hour, the world feels better when you come around. Our love affair needs to last forever (although I may cheat on you with your early morning sister)."

it's time for a FIELD TRIP!

2011-05-10T10:45:00.003-04:00

Did anyone else hear that title in Miss Frizzle's voice?
Moving on... On Saturday, mom and I were babysitting one of her former students, who is so much like me when I was her age, and so we just had to go to the Museum of Discovery and Science. I went over winter break so I was overdue for a return trip. I didn't take too many pictures because my main priority was my mini-me but I couldn't resist sharing a few of my favorites. I already sent my favorite people photos to her parents.

I love the fruit bats.

If I ever questioned why I needed higher ISO capabilities, this shot proves it. Hello 1/50 handheld shutter speed. (For those of you who don't know much about photography, low light means I need a longer shutter speed, which most likely entails me either putting my camera on a tripod or having a blurry shot because I move too much.)

I got a better picture of this guy last time. His glass was a little smudged and he was a little sleepy.

Those of you who knew me pre-blog know my obsession with alligators. (I'm slightly embarrassed by how awful some of those photos are.) While mom and her student explored the kids' section, I chilled at the alligator tank.

There was one gator who kept diving into the fountain and trying to grab something. I think he was trying to catch some lunch, except there isn't any in the tank.

first thing in the morning [52:18]

2011-05-07T10:33:00.002-04:00

This is what it looks like to realize that you kind of, sort of, maybe missed the deadline for project 52 this week. This is me with my hair unbrushed, facing my window and taking in a moment of calm before going back to freaking out about missing deadline.

the sun came up with no conclusions//flowers sleeping in their beds//the city's cemetery's humming//I'm wide awake, it's morning
-Bright Eyes

home

2011-05-05T10:52:00.003-04:00

Dear home,
I'm here.
I already miss being close to the beach.

But it's good to be home.

soft and sweet [I heart faces]

2011-05-01T11:39:00.003-04:00

This week's theme over at is soft and sweet.

I never blogged this photo before. I posted it on Facebook as part of my spring break album and left it at that. It took me this long to be okay with putting my heart out there.
I came home from school on a Thursday. I left right after class to pick up my friend Corbin from the airport and have a fun day with him when he flew in. Truthfully, I was afraid his visit was going to be boring and awful because that Friday, I had heart surgery. That night, Doug and Corbin curled up in my bed, hugging my stuffed animals and filling them with love for me to take to the hospital.
This was one of those quiet moments that I needed more than anything. His love gave me the calm I needed to be able to walk into the OR (literally) and tell the doctors I was ready.

Interestingly enough, I managed to go on an airboat ride 2 days post-op.

little moments

2011-04-29T09:49:00.003-04:00

I haven't been taking a lot of pictures recently because my heart medicine has been wrecking havoc on my nerves in my left hand and arm. There, I said it. Once again, my heart is keeping me from doing what I want to be doing. While the doctors and I are working on fixing things so I can get back to being a Photoshop-addicted shutterbug, things are slowing down on the blog. At the moment, I am having a rather difficult time as I am reducing the dosage of my medicine to get my arm back to useful again. What's a girl to do to battle the difficulties and take advantage of her arm while ignoring the pain? Obviously, I decided to toss my telephoto lens on my 50D (the heavier of my DSLRs and my favorite) and go for a walk. I looked up and down and all around and just tried to appreciate the little details.

I found a crayon and I smiled. And then I smiled some more when I got back to my computer and realized the angle I took the shots gave me a pretend tilt shift depth of field.

I twirled in the golden afternoon sunlight reflecting off the paving stones and soaked in every ray and lens flare I could.

I marveled over how strange it is that Abacoa wants to be this perfect place when the beauty is in the imperfections.

I enjoyed the details that were just perfect in that moment as I took the shot, knowing that this moment was mine and mine alone.

I befriended some birds and worked on my tree faces project some more.

I wish there were photos of me swinging on the swings. I managed to hold onto the chain and swing really high. It was amazing and I felt like I was flying. It was the first time in a long time I could do that and I don't know when I'll be able to again.
On the walk home, I caught a gorgeous sunset over my beloved B sign.

It's moments like these that remind me how beautiful the world is, even when I think it sucks sometimes.

preschool princess [52:17]

2011-04-24T21:43:00.003-04:00

I don't know what came over me. I needed some sunshine and laughter. One minute, I'm looking at the project 52 theme for the week and wondering why being a princess is so desirable and the next thing I knew, I was bringing my tutu to Cassidy so she could complete her 'preschool princess' look. Make-up was smeared on haphazardly and glitter was sprayed every which way. And then we were at the playground, climbing on things...

I'm still not entirely sure how this shoot happened but it was pretty funny.

warm and fuzzy [52:16]

2011-04-22T21:17:00.004-04:00

After the seriousness of the last post, I needed something cute and lovable. Since Erin posted on twitter that she wanted a bunny, I thought I'd let my stuffed bunny reply.

Unfortunately, she was too short to reach all the keys, even when she was sitting on my photo album.

thankful

2011-04-19T15:22:00.004-04:00

Dear home,
I don't write a lot of personal stuff here. I'm not one of those bloggers who talks about her day, let alone pours her heart out onto the keyboard. If you just come here for the pretty pictures, you may not really be interested in this post. But this is perhaps the most amazing thing I have ever had the honor to write about.
A friend of mine has been struggling a lot lately with mental illness and the way life is so unfair sometimes. (I don't wish to talk about her business on my blog so pardon how vague I'm being.) Her blog posts have been getting darker and more depressing and her friends/readers have been getting more and more concerned. When she posted what amounted to her obituary on her blog, everyone left comments about how they love her and hope that she didn't kill herself. And then, we all turned to each other. We kept commenting and refreshing her blog until we crashed it. Conversations were had via twitter as everyone mobilized to track down her family, her friends, and ultimately her. I could hear a collective exclamation of "thank God!" when the news came in that she's alive and getting help.
I don't have words for the way this makes me feel. The idea of a community getting together online to support each other isn't exactly a novel concept, but this still blows me away. People from far away were messaging local friends and calling around because they all love.

While I don't have a large reader base, I have the fortune of knowing the majority of you personally. I am doubly thankful that good people in my life are close in proximity to me if I need them.

see my heart [52:15]

2011-04-16T12:44:00.002-04:00

I almost didn't participate this week but I got a great idea at the last minute.

Some people see the zig-zag as implying that my heart is broken. Others see a lightning bolt and see how hard I am fighting. A few see the way I am holding my hand and realize I have limited use of my arm. And if anyone can see the yellow lightning bolts, they know how much pain I am in.

Sadly, the only thing people seem to see when they look at me is my heart condition. I wish I could be more than that.

life's a drag sometimes

2011-04-15T14:41:00.005-04:00

Believe it or not, I've been shooting a lot. I just haven't been blogging. I missed project 52 last week (and am currently on a crash course with missing it again this week too) because my recent projects have been for people who haven't given me permission to blog them. That, and my health is getting in the way. But I don't want to look back on this and see how much the pain held me back; I only want to see what I did that was so amazing. So now that I've given the obligatory mention of the heart suck, I can move on to what makes my heart shine.
Under things I'm not allowed to share are a Bar Mitzvah, a Girl Scout event, and chasing a toddler around a bookstore. In other words, the fun shoots have to stay top secret.

The good news is that the most off-the-wall shoot I have is completely open to sharing. There was a drag show on campus Wednesday night to kick off the Day of Silence a day early (because of the honors symposium today). I had a great time and I feel like it was beneficial to opening up some difficult dialogue.

I think the highlight of everyone's night was the question-and-answer session. The emcee was expecting the typical "what's your favorite color?" style questions while the HC audience was asking about proper pronoun use ('she' and 'her') and performing arts training.

[Pictures hosted on Facebook because I didn't want to have my flickr photostream labeled as 'adult content']

fairy tales and false utopias

2011-04-07T15:27:00.003-04:00

Sorry for the long time between posts. Another day, another diagnosis.
That, and I had a LOT of photos to edit. On Saturday, I covered a Girl Scout event, followed by one of the most amazing personal project shoots ever. While officially, I am turning in one of these shots for my digital art class, I took these for me.

First, a fairy tale. The piece for class needs to be based off a fairy tale or traditional folk tale. I decided to go the crazy, inspired route and do the Brothers Grimm version of Sleeping Beauty. My inspiration was the fact that the original story references a spindle, not a spinning wheel, and I just so happened to have a friend with a drop spindle. Some fake blood, a princess dress, and two tiaras later, we had these.

I'm planning to make a mixed media piece with fake blood and the yarn she was spinning. I can't wait to have it hanging on my wall.

We also decided since she was bloody anyway, we might as well have some fun with it. I have an Eve hypo from Bioshock and decided it would be fun to have her be a splicer trying to stab me. Sadly, we ran out of time before we could light up the hypo and go crazy.

But there's always next time

save a horse, ride a cowboy [52:13]

2011-04-01T16:49:00.003-04:00

While country music isn't really my cup of tea, sometimes it provides for the best jokes. At the gender bender hoedown last night, "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" came on and I got the best idea ever: I had one of the 'lovely ladies' ride my 'cowboy' roommate so I could take a picture. Actually, I had two different guys 'riding' Rachael for photos because the Honors College is full of awesome.

It's ridiculous, I know. But this week's theme for project 52 is "just for fun!" and it was the funniest thing I could think of. Plus, this is my 200th post. I figure I'll either drive in more readership or scare off everyone except my mom. (Hi, mom!)

I have permission from all parties involved to post this. It isn't an April Fools' Day prank. And I still cannot stop laughing.

slice of life [I heart faces]

2011-03-27T12:00:00.002-04:00

The theme over at is slice of life. It's both the most open-ended theme and a restriction at the same time.

This image I chose is a leap of faith for me. It is not perfect at all. I had my fisheye adapter on my lens so I could see everyone as we stood around the grill. We were making s'mores last night during Earth Hour and I decided I wanted to take pictures. There was no way I could pose anyone; I could barely keep them from moving in the time it took to trip the shutter. The light was uneven because it was mostly flickering flames with some ambient light from the streetlights (which I wish they had turned off). No flash, on-camera or off. Not even a tripod. But it was perfect. I was laughing with my friends as we set marshmallows on fire.

Epcot in a wheelchair

2011-03-26T15:54:00.011-04:00

Last Saturday was the Honors College's annual spring trip to Orlando and this year we went to Epcot! With the way my heart (and leg) have been bothering me, I opted to do this trip in a wheelchair. It was a hard choice to make but I decided that I was up to taking pictures and riding some of the rides; why not make the chair a bonus ride?
I was slightly heartbroken--although not really surprised--to discover that when I was in the wheelchair, I was either invisible or judged by strangers who couldn't be bothered to let us through, let alone talk to me. Thank goodness the cast members were all super nice.

Moving on... the first thing we saw as we came through the gate were Toy Story topiaries. This month is the garden festival and I was so excited.

Since we were all geeking out about the plants anyway, we decided to start at the Land. And then I talked the boys into doing the Living Seas first. I think this may have had something to do with it.

The awesome marine life also may have helped my case.

Make no mistake, we also enjoyed the Land.

Dave is our resident land-based genius and wanted to do the behind-the-scenes tour. He had to settle for skipping to the front of the line for the boat tour.

I didn't really take too many pictures in Figment or Innoventions but I did manage to get Dave sprayed by a dancing fountain.

I also managed to get one snapshot in line for Mission Space. Green team is go for launch!

I did enjoy some more topiaries as we went but I was counting the seconds until the World Showcase.

This is just a general overview of the World Showcase because I didn't want to bog the blog down too much.

These photos from Morocco are dedicated to Erin Kotecki Vest, who told me that I could do the park in a wheelchair happily. It's nice to have a friend who understands how much limitations suck and how great it is to overcome them. (Lupus sucks, heart conditions suck, and we rule. Just saying.) Doug decided we needed to rest in Morocco, in part so I could have more photos to send to Erin (whose blog post on doing Disney in a wheelchair prepared me for this trip and encouraged me to actually go).

We continued on after Morocco and visited an exhibit on sustainable outdoor entertaining, where Doug met his new muse.

Then, we finished the rest of the World Showcase.

We spent golden hour admiring more topiaries and killing time until our fast pass was ready and we could ride Test Track.

Our ride on Test Track was pretty magical.

It was moonrise and a super moon and I don't have a single picture. You'll just have to trust me that it was absolutely gorgeous to zoom around in the car under that giant moon.

We watched the fireworks from a distance because there was no way to fight through the crowd and ensure I had a good view. I think our hilltop, with ice cream for dinner, was the best way to end the day.

I apologize is this post isn't nearly as eloquent or coherent or awesome as usual. It's taken me a week to get the photos together and write this and I am tired. But I had fun, I promise.

dreaming of a ring [52:12]

2011-03-25T16:26:00.002-04:00

At the moment, I'm slowly going through the photos from Epcot last weekend as I feel up to sitting at the desk. In the mean time, I couldn't resist having a somewhat funny entry for my project 52. This week's theme is "from the jewelry box" so I thought I'd share my 'engagement ring' from the epic vacation of doom on top of the sketch of what my eventual ring will look like. (For the story of the fake ring, please see the anniversary post.)

I have yet to miss a week for project 52. I am proud of myself.

hope on wings [52:11]

2011-03-17T03:16:00.003-04:00

I felt much better when I posted about spring break. Now I feel kind of cruddy, but life goes on and so must I.

I got this butterfly as part of a bouquet my father brought me when I was in the hospital. When the sun shines through my window and lands on it, I feel hopeful that I'll feel better soon. It heals my (metaphorical) heart, which gives me the patience to let my (physical) heart heal.

one toy soldier [52:10]

2011-03-10T22:21:00.003-05:00

I have no idea where he came from. I only have one toy soldier. He usually guards my bookshelf but today I assigned him some weather recon. I wanted to know when the storm broke. I wanted a lookout in case there was a rainbow. I wanted to make the best of bed rest and have a little fun.

surgery and spring break so far

2011-03-08T09:01:00.005-05:00

Dear readers,
I mentioned off-hand a few posts ago that I was going in for heart surgery and then left you hanging. Sorry about that. Surgery on Friday went well. My heart is still adjusting to a 'normal' rhythm so it has a few blips here and there but the difference overall is like night and day. I feel like me again. Well, except for the discomfort from them making incisions essentially in my hips. The bruising is something fierce and is entirely too gruesome to post where everyone can see and it's still a pain to be in any position too long or to walk around for long periods of time.

I am so happy to be home. When I left the hospital, the only visible proof of anything was the gauze from where the IV was, my bracelet, and my limp. (And also the balloons and flowers.)

I'm glad that I rebounded so quickly because I uh... had pressing plans to get to. While I couldn't take him to Islands of Adventure as promised, I still wanted to give him the best time in Florida I could. Yes, my best friend Corbin flew in from Virginia the day before I went in for surgery.

He and Doug kept me busy the night before and visited me the second mom would let them into my hospital room (although I did not bring my camera so there are no pictures of that).

On Sunday (despite me overexerting myself in the shower and getting so bruised that I looked like I got hit my a truck), the boys and I went on an airboat ride. While I did not take any photos on the actual boat ride, that was only because I was too busy making kissy faces at the purple gallinules. They are my favorite Everglades bird and I never would have noticed them if I had been looking through my camera. I did get a few pictures during the alligator show.

I felt like such a tourist but it's okay because Corbin actually was one.

I was also equally as excited about the peacocks as I was about the alligators. Once I saw the first one on the roof, I was smitten.

It wouldn't be an adventure without a rear view mirror shot... and this time I have Corbin taking pictures out the window too.

When it came time to say goodbye to Corbin yesterday, I did not want to. I'm pretty sure I clung to him at the airport for ten minutes, trying to figure out how to keep him from leaving.

Doug wasn't exactly immune either.

I may have bribed him with some gator jerky on the way home.

In a nutshell, that's how my spring break has been so far. Surgery, which I am recovering from at an amazing pace. Adventure, which I intend to have more of. Best friends and great memories, which seems to be the majority of my blog posts. And photos, because this is a photo blog.
Sorry all the photos are linked from Facebook. I have to switch positions frequently so I didn't want to make posting photos to Flickr a 2 hour endeavor.

express yourself [I heart faces]

2011-02-28T17:15:00.003-05:00

I am totally double-dipping again this week. The theme over at is anything but a face, while the theme for project 52 is express yourself.

This is who I am. I am the girl who loves to watch her purple cotton candy hair blow in the breeze + take photos + listen to mix cds + LOVE.
[I am not the girl who can't explore because of her heart problem. I don't want that to define me.]

life is a beach

2011-02-28T05:28:00.002-05:00

I don't write about my heart problem often. It's bothersome and keeps me from getting photos, so occasionally I'll say "sorry for the lack of photos; my heart isn't cooperating" but leave it at that. Hopefully after surgery on Friday, I won't need to mention it again. But I really want to complain about it tonight. I went to the beach with Doug, Seth, and Lexa but I couldn't swim or climb rocks or even frolic in the waves with them because of my stupid heart. I couldn't even hold my camera with the telephoto lens for more than 2 minutes at a time without pain. (Compare to the last time I took photos of Seth and Lexa.) This is what I managed to do today (well, yesterday according to the computer but I haven't slept yet so it's still today to me). Hopefully this week will be the last time I have to have this talk with you. In the mean time, I am happy to report that today was mostly fun.

This is what I live for.

I made the colors really bright/cheerful/pop-y on purpose. I needed it. I also am linking them from Facebook because I am tired and hoping to go to sleep eventually. soon.

Mai-Kai

2011-02-22T22:15:00.006-05:00

In honor of my dad's 50th birthday, we went out to Mai-Kai, an amazing Polynesian-themed restaurant. I have wanted to visit forever and I finally got to. The dancers held me in thrall and I must have taken 150 photos of them. These are my absolute favorites.

I am so thankful that my camera can handle high ISO because the flame dance was amazing (and for the performers' safety, flash was outlawed).

I'm sorry that this post is so light on words but I don't really know what to say other than that this is an experience that you need to have for yourself.

[PS: This last shot ended up being my project 52 entry for the week.]

couch with a view

2011-02-16T17:52:00.004-05:00

Back in September, the boys and I found a couch on the side of the road. From the moment she was in my possession, I knew I wanted to use Princess Buttercup as a photo shoot prop. (Yes, I named my couch. It is a buttery yellow Italian leather and I feel like it deserves some respect.) Over the weekend, Dave and I took it with us to MacArthur Beach State Park and offered free photos to anyone who wanted to pose for us. The response was surprisingly positive. Everyone we asked was more than willing to let us take a few photos. (If we took your picture and you're reading this, email us and we'll send you files you can print.)

I am looking forward to being able to take my couch to a more easily accessible beach next time.

for once, my heart is in it

2011-02-15T01:03:00.005-05:00

I know this post counts as double-dipping but I had an idea and I executed it. And now I am tired. This week's theme over at is red, in support of Go Red For Women (women's heart health). It's also "open your heart" week for Project 52.

My immediate thought, based on both themes, was a (broken) heart. After all, my actual heart is broken/in need of repair. I didn't really want to go into it on the blog but the only way this photo makes sense is with some disclosure. My heart has an electrical issue which will be 'corrected' over spring break. I actually knit the heart I am clutching for my 'heart electrician' as a thank you for finally diagnosing me. I am nervous over the idea of having to be hospitalized, which is breaking my heart further.
I feel like I spent the past few months standing alone in a cold, sterile atmosphere, waiting for an answer and trying to hold my heart together. I feel like a shadow of who I usually am, especially when I want so desperately to be shooting nonstop. This is me opening my heart and being honest about why I haven't been posting much as of late.
[For the record, this isn't heart disease and being more "heart healthy" would not have prevented it. But I still encourage everyone, regardless of gender, to look into the tips on Go Red For Women's site.]

be mine, Valentine

2011-02-14T11:25:00.001-05:00

In the past, I have written really in-depth posts about my mister and how I feel about him. Last Valentine's day, I wrote about how I had always wished for a love like his. For our one year anniversary, I told the story of our relationship and was mushy enough to make myself cry. I feel like I should have another monumental post covering everything from our anniversary to now. But while I have been falling more and more in love with him every day, we haven't exactly done much worth blogging. Our parents finally met over the holidays but other than that, nothing major has happened. Well, at least nothing other than a physically broken heart, but that's not relevant to this story.
Rather than try to scrape together some new content to share, we're going to reprise our traditional dinner and stargazing. Because really, we love each other every day and I'm sure regular readers are more than aware of this.

setting goals [52:6]

2011-02-12T02:45:00.004-05:00

I almost forgot to do my project 52 entry for the week so it's only appropriate that this is what I chose.

This is from a guide on how to set attainable goals. I'm participating in project 52 mostly to be able to say that I stuck it out. It's a reasonable goal: one photo a week for a year. It fits all the criteria.
Now, if only I could get my entries in before the last minute...

heart [I heart faces]

2011-02-07T10:22:00.003-05:00

This week's theme over at is hearts. That is perfect, since I spent Thursday and Friday working on a Valentine's Day card for my roommate, Rachael.

Consider this a teaser of what the final card looks like. This was taken while she was drawing the chalk art for the final card.